New Journey

"I hope that now that you have something, you won't use it as an excuse to quit."

I went to the doctor because something was wrong. He gave me a diagnosis. When I shared the diagnosis, this was a response I got.

Internally I chuckled. 

See - it isn't something new. It's just finally showing. I have had so many problems growing up with allergies and the unknown. I could handle the allergies. I knew what to do. Black eyes - take medication. Stuffy nose - runny nose... take medication. I knew my limits with my allergies and I became aware of my surroundings so that I could stay away from what set my allergies off. Pollen is high - Well, that meant its an inside day for me. Instead of planning an outdoor adventure, go see a movie instead. Get a book and stay home and read. I did that a lot. 

But the unknown was what I hated. 

I knew something was wrong with my body. But Doctors couldn't figure it out, so they played it as mental.

But I knew it wasn't mental...

You arn't supposed to get itchy after half a mile as a teenager and scratch so much that you bleed in pe class. 

Your muscles arn't supposed to be so sore, tired, and tight that when you bend over to pick something up that you pop in three different places. 

Yes, I understand as you get older, this tends to happen. But I am only 31, and this has been happening since at least middle school.

I know my periods are abnormal because when alllll of my friends look at me and say, "you're still on your period? you were on it last week." and your mom has to write notes to all of your teachers every year to please allow me unlimited bathroom breaks because of those extra long - extra heavy periods. Something is up.

and those are just a few symptoms. Sometimes they don't coincide or are caused by the same thing. Sometimes you don't like the option you are given. Like after 2 years of a crazy long and unpredictable periods my mom refused the option when the doctor suggested her 13 year old get put on birth control to regulate.

But this... finally is a diagnosis for something. And it explains a lot of things! 

I have psoriasis. 

It's a name. It's an explanation. Now with any diagnosis, there is a time to freak out. I did. I cried when I got home, because I didn't understand.  So here it is Psoriasis in all its glory for you to read and understand. Maybe learn something new. Maybe don't click the link and read. But a lot of my journey will be surrounding this. Because this is not something I can claim. 

When everything is itchy and I'm bat shit cranky... well I've stressed too much lately and its flared up.  So as I go through this.. I'll let you in on my journey. 

Right now - its really bad. I have patches every where and I am putting a cream on it to help until I get my dermatology appt. 

A whole load of update

Well, life got crazy. Some how I didn't keep up with my blog like I had hoped I would. Although I have managed to make new foods and tons of crafts, I never stayed on the post.

So update?

Let's see... after being kept away on the long deployment and several small ones, the hubby finally threw in his hat. He left USMC for civilian mechanics. He is now trying to get into college and works for a local tow company to keep flexible hours.

Billy is now 8. yes 8! He has grown so much in the last 3 years. His articulation is so much better. Before the public school stopped his program last year due to funding, he was almost where he needed to be at his age. His vocabulary is still years beyond his age. He is now a foot shorter than me and can fit inside my shoes. Luckily the only shoes he tries to wear, are my cowboy boots.
After pre-k and a horrible year at his school, we placed him at a private school nearby. He flourished and learned so much. He was very excited about school every day. He joined the soccer and basketball team, some of the teams over the years I coached. So that was interesting. He will be starting third grade at a new catholic private school in the area. He made his communion last year and wants to try and become an altar boy to continue his journey with God. He is still obsessed with dinosaurs and wants to be a Paleontologist when he grows up.

Right now the latest game craze with these boys is Pokemon Go, Minecraft, and Skylanders.

We are also active scout members... fun times.

Beau is still my best snuggler. He is seven and loves Soccer, pokemon, and all animals. He is planning on becoming a Zoo keeper when he grows up. He basically wants to be a Kratt brother. He started pre-k at the private school when he transferred Billy over. He had a hard start being away from mommy but he flourished with wonderful teachers. He graduated kinder and started first grade. He is still my observant over thinker. He will watch you do the activity and see your accomplishments and failures so he can do the activity the correct way the first attempt. Work smarter - not harder. lol He did get tested to have articulation problems, but after one year between speech therapy and his pre- kinder teacher - he tested out of it by kinder year. So he's doing great. We will be working on Wolf stuff this year with scouts.

Baby girl - my adorable little baby is grown up. She just turned 6 this summer. We had an Indian princess themed party for her. Lets see - she was tested for articulation and no one could understand her. It was generally all pointing and pouting. She started speech therapy and with the school district she had two years of therapy and a lot of help from her wonderful pre-k and kinder teacher. I received nothing but praises of her over her first two years in school. Everyone that has met her - fell in love with her. She joined daisies this last year and was adorable. She did run into a little bit of bullying when some girls paid comments that the daisy pinafore was for babies and this year I'm buying the vest for her instead. She graduated kinder this year - a bitter sweet moment for me since she's no longer a toddler. She has always been a princess and wanted to be a princess when she grew up but at graduation she changed that to kinder teacher. She is my girly girl and part of my whole world.

AS for me - well I volunteered at the new kids school as lunch room supervisor, soccer coach, and basketball coach. I helped with all the field trips and parties. I also finally started working on my weight at 30... I had reached almost 200 lbs and realized I needed to do something. So my sister signed me up for a color run as motivation. I started walking every day and lost 50 lbs. I was doing really good, until I was involved in a car accident. My knees hit the dashboard and sent residual damage to my hips and spine. I wasn't able to keep up with my walking and with my busy schedule I also didn't have the time to sit on the sideline for a few weeks to recover and heal.
I started school again so I could finish more hours towards my teacher certification. I had observation hours, class hours, and I was working on top of that. I was also Tiger leader for Beau and volunteered with the Daisies with Baby. I was attending all of Beau's soccer games. Billy was out for awhile due to an ankle injury. I was coach last year for Baby and her pre-k/kinder team. We won all of our games. Undefeated champs but within the christian league there are no special amazing trophies for overall winners.
So slowly I have put back on about 15 pounds in the time since the accident, but my body is finally ready to work out again. So I'll be pushing myself to lose it again. Hmmm... I finally learned from my grandmother and best friend how to crochet in February. So that has been amazing. Ive been following patterns and even created my own. My dinosaurs are sooooooo freaking adorable. The kids wanted their class goodbye presents to be crochet gifts. So I created 10 diplomas for the kinder kids, 18 octopi and 3 for my kids for the first grade class, and 9 dinosaurs for the second grade class. Not including the dinosaurs I created for my kids, my friends kids, and the other weird things I have finished. Dr Seuss "Oh the places you will go" balloon, a frog, a book worm, a slug, and some other random creations. It has been fun and very addicting.

right now - I think thats the majority.